Today was one of those days when just nothing seemed to go right – as if my already escalating feelings of despondence weren’t enough, the bus ride back home turned out to be one of the most annoying I’ve ever had. I’ve said this before and I say it again – I fail to understand why women think there’s no reason to complain if the person leaning heavily against you is another woman! Sorry boss, you violate my privacy irrespective of what sex you are. I do not like to be pushed – so what if you’re a woman? The offense is no less. Argh!!! Consequently, I’ve returned home with a throbbing shoulder, a headache and very little patience left to deal with the morons and irritating vermins of the world. Grrrr…
A few weeks back my friend Kunal was here – he came back with me after my last trip to Bombay & stayed a week. It was so nice having him around, being able to talk him at the end of the day that now the enforced isolation is grating even more. I have never been an extrovert and always found it difficult to strike up a conversation with a stranger or get acquainted with new people; it’s harder at this age than ever before. Friends from childhood may have drastically different temperaments, interests and lifestyles – but they are the people you grew up with. So the differences just seem to fade away when you’re together. Frankly if I were to befriend someone today, the person would have to think on the same wave-length as me, atleast 50% of the time, or else we’ve got to share a great chemistry. Call it a failing in my personality, but I simply can’t get myself to “make friends” with people I meet – just like that. A question I face very often these days : “So have you made any friends yet? There must be people your age in your colony or in class.” It'snever been more difficult to explain that I don’t “make friends” so easily, that I’m not a vibrant, out-going person. *Sigh*
I miss my friends more than ever these days – I always knew that we’d go different ways after graduation/post-graduation, but when the distances grow, and more and more friends seem to live on the other end of the globe, the world seems to become increasingly lonely.
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6 comments:
Does such days have anything to do with the moon and the stars and their postions? many ancient civilizations believed so, and why is this relationship not researched in a more broader form in this science infected modern 21st century civilization? i wonder!
Hmm.I can see easily where you are coming from and I concur with you.The problem is that it doesnt matter whether you are an extrovert/introvert the condition you describe afflicts the population in equal measure.
I am an extrovert and see my latest blog on "depression".yeah..most of my friends are getting married or in the process of so called "settling down" which does affect me in strange ways..
I guess this phase too shall pass.
Hmm your post seemingly describes a phase which most of us are going through or have been through...and with time we tend to lose track of many people who are close to the heart.
Most often it's the distance ...this is an awfully traumatic phase but just look around, am sure you'll find someone whom you can relate well...it would surely make a difference to have atleast one such person in whichever place you are!!!
I had been through this phase and somehow have been able to pick myself ,thanx to friends around! :)
Cheer up Geets...Hoping you'd find solace!
Heey sorry didn't realise I had posted as anon ...anyways take care!
hey i can totally get what u r saying and i've been down that road many times. even tho i tend to make "friends" easily after moving to a new place it takes me a long time to actually build that all important trust and by the time i actually make a few good friends, it's time to leave. even now i have a ton of friends to hang out with and have a good time but only a handful of "real" friends. it sucks, but C'est la vie.
Thanks everyone, for all those supporting comments - some say all this is a phase, that I just need to find what I'm looking for (and sometimes I agree)...usually when I'm in this kind of a dark mood I know have PMS to blame, this time it was just PMT (pune municipal transport) - after a long and futile day, it was like a breaking point and lo and behold -I let loose a barrage of complaints!
Time shall reveal all, I guess - till then its comforting to know there are wonderful people out there!
PS Sreekesh, now that you've brought it up - how the sun and moon could affect our moods - you could take it up as a study too! :-)
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