Monday, November 27, 2006

What Do You Say...

When someone tells you that the moon in all its sublime glory can’t be more beautiful than you?

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

But But But...

It’s been a tiring week and I’m feeling awful about not having written to friends even though I’ve been back for over a week now, not to mention not being able to accomplish everything on my agenda. Time just seems to slip out of fingers like loose sand and before I know it, it’s already past midnight and I still have a dozen odd-things left to complete. I shouldn’t complain – I’ve got pretty much what I asked for and it’s not like it’s been all work and no play. Despite the fact that I’m now working weekends, this weekend was much fun, with a movie, lunch and a soirée organized by my students. Actually managed to dodge a potentially traumatic weekend merely by keeping myself occupied from 6 a.m to way past midnight! But…there’s always a BUT, isn’t there?

I don’t know…while it’s wonderful to be so busy, to be on my feet and constantly doing something and putting those grey cells to work, I’m finding myself wishing for something more. What I really need right now is…

- Someone who will hold my hand and tell me that it will be alright, someone who will just hold me and be there for me when I’m feeling so incredibly tired of putting up a brave front, when all my reserves are wearing thin and when I’m reeling desperately out of control.
- To organize myself into some kind of a routine, that helps me balance work (which is surprisingly becoming more and more challenging by the day) and studies, along with my other responsibilities.
- But what I need more than anything else is for Papa to tell me that what I’m doing and what I plan to do is the right thing…

Monday, November 20, 2006

Why...

Do I have this over-whelming urge to stick my head in sand?

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

20/20

When I packed my bags before I left for Bombay, it was with some trepidation – I didn’t know what to expect from the “stage” – all I knew that I was going to Bombay for a fortnight, something that will probably not happen again for a very long time. To say, that I’ve returned satisfied with my experience would be an understatement. The programme was dense, to say the least, and there were many days when I left the center feeling the burden of information over-load and grasping for words in English, having spent 8-10 hours with the French language and the best ways to teach it! (Yes, it led to much exasperation and frustration for my dear friends who had to bear the brunt of my “Frenchification” and at least one of them got back by talking to me in Marathi !) I hadn’t counted on the programme being this demanding, intense and exhausting – I definitely hadn’t imagined that I’d come down with fever and have to take class when I was burning with temperature! But it was worth it – all of it, from getting up at 5.15 am daily and commuting to other corner of the city, and then putting in 8-10 hours of work before heading back home…

The amount I’ve learnt in this short span has made me realize just how much more I still have to learn – it’s also made me painfully aware of my short-comings and the areas where I need to work and improve myself. Needless to say, if I were to re-do my self-evaluation post, I’d probably give myself a 6 on 10 – maybe a 7, but that’s only ‘coz I’d be cutting myself some slack for being a “professeur debutante”! On the other hand, I can’t deny the fact that I see an improvement in myself – in terms of fluency with the language, comfort levels with Didactic theory and the related notions and ofcourse my class preparation – I’m putting in a lot more time and effort into my class plans and I can already see the results in class!

While the “stage” was complete success, at least from the point of view of pedagogic training, social angle was…interesting! Surprisingly, I got along with everybody in the group and had quite a bit of fun as well – there were also many moments of pure mirth and befuddlement at the attitudes and behavior of some of my "co-stagiaires"!

I didn’t quite manage to do everything I had planned, or meet even half the people I’d wanted to meet, but I finally got to spend a reasonable amount of time with my closest friend and with another dear friend. Strangely, in hindsight, even that time doesn’t seem enough! Squeezed in a rendezvous with another friend, with whom I haven’t spent time since last year – that was a nice evening. Spent a day with the parents of another close friend – and was hit very hard by how much I miss her and the reality that we truly have chosen our different paths and life is taking us all far away from each other. If our friendship had to pass tests before, this one’s going to be the toughest!

Met people about whom I’d heard a lot and had been itching to meet for over a year now – and apart from the fact that it involved watching one strange film with too many brains being blown out, it was an extremely fun evening! Make that three evenings and one very satisfying dinner-n-dessert! There was also this one painfully catastrophic night, which I’d like to pretend didn’t happen – but unfortunately it did, and I have no option but to face up to the fact that amongst my eccentric friends, there also exist(ed) some truly weird personalities which I can do without.

Apart from that…

I’m glad I went to - the Hard Rock Café with Aristera and A.S – the combination of rocking music and good company went down quite well with the beer.
I blew up money on – books and music at Landmark, stationary at Chimanlal, chappals at Colaba Causeway, a facial and radically short hair-cut (for me) at a nieghbourhood salon.
I was zapped and then just died of amusement when - I was addressed as Kundamini, Pratibha and even Gajgamini in class by a forgetful formatrice!

I’ve tried hard to sum up the experience in one word but I’m afraid it’s a motley of words that I’ve come up with – enriching, frustrating, fulfilling, exhausting, satisfying, thrilling, enlightening!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Mes Affaires

Voilà – mes affaires!

A hopeless romantic who is boringly sensible and quite practical, even though undeniably eccentric – what else would you expect on her bed-side table?