But human cows aren't the only animals that inhabit my classes. For the longest time, I was teaching in a classroom (where I still have to teach every once in a while) which had boxes and boxes of the last decade's archives (read junk which should be either sold or simply burnt) belonging to the Alliance Française de Poona. Now cartons and boxes provide perfect nooks and corners for spiders and other vague insects and creepy crawlies to thrive and where there are creepy crawlies, there must be reptiles, or at least lizards...and thus every now and then, a lizard would decide to come and attend class. And of course the lizard would just *have* to be the more ardent of my students and had to come padding its way closer to me, while my insides squirmed in disgust and I tried my best to restrain the urge to jump over to the other side of the class like a skittish foal!
The appearance at my classroom window, of the occasional crow who tries his level best to drown out my voice, much to the mirth of my students isn't quite as comforting to my teacher's ego...but little beats the damage done by my canine friends. On one occasion when I was teaching and fifteen minutes into class, the door was suddenly pushed open. Turning around expecting to see a student and prepared to ask "Pourquoi es-tu en retard?" I was puzzled when my eyes didn't fall on any face...searching, my eyes fell further down, to encounter a muzzle...the owner pushed the door further and in walked Monsieur Deshpande, the local dog. He proceeded to saunter right to the center of the classroom and settled there with a rather questioning look on his face! I had a tough time getting him out of class - and much to my chagrin, I was forced to acknowledge that this was not one of my fans, for he was there not to gain the seeds of knowledge or bask in my enthralling presence, but to inquire about the source of his daily dose of Parle G biscuits!
Recently, I had to teach once again with a canine friend in class - much to my disgruntled amusement, this one also didn't seem to find my pedagogic practices particularly interesting for once he'd rubbed himself against my calves and got himself petted, he proceeded to stretch, yawned straight into my amused face...and then stretched himself at my feet and promptly fell asleep! I continued to teach, hopping over him and moving around him till he finally roused himself from his power nap some thirty minutes later, threw me a bored look and sauntered out of class once again!
I've now been teaching for nearly four years and just when I thought I'd seen all sorts of creatures stroll through my class, with the strangest of mannerisms and gaits, I have yet another visitor...one who walks sideways. A handicap, I'd say but this fellow moved with amazing speed and accuracy, making his way across the room speedily towards me. Spotting him from the corner of my eye, I paused in the middle of explaining the conjugation of a verb, and turned my head to ensure that I wasn't hallucinating...and it truly was a crab that was racing across the floor towards me! Funnily enough, despite my alarm, I continued in almost the next breath, calmly as though I was still talking about the verb, "Il y a un crabe dans la salle..." I leave you to imagine the chaos that followed my declaration!
After calming my students, who had succeeded in making the crab take refuge amongst the wires in a corner of the podium at which I was standing, I continued teaching, keeping a wary eye on the crab that crawled out a few minutes later and settled himself a few inches away from me. The crab insisted on scurrying after me every time I moved, leaving me quite pleased by his devotion to French. Now if only I inspired such devotion in my human students! Sigh...
P.S If you found my experiences even remotely interesting and/or amusing, you'll definitely enjoy this book.
